the big picture

making moves. it's something that i've been saying for a while now. i think i originally heard it in a song by the rocket summer, but i've taken stole it and made it my own (that's how art works, folks). i've been making a lot of moves within the past year or so. oh, i guess i should clarify...'making moves' meaning changing something in your life. speaking of making moves...i was able to sleep in (7:30am) today and it was amazing. i ate some cereal (three freakin' bowls), watched some informational television educating us on the difference between monkeys and apes. did you know male monkeys can't see the color red? so, here i sit blogging away with american football playing lightly in the background so my gorgeous wife can continue to rest before we go get lost in the woods trail running.

you ever wonder what the big picture looks like? i do...all of the time. as big as it is though, i lose sight of it all too quickly. it's probably more that i am distracted and looking the other way really. i'll admit it...i am a selfish human that cares about what i'm going through way too much. i turn twenty-six today and i'm having the exact same feelings that i did when i turned twenty-five..."what have i done?" i'm not talking about college degrees, careers, getting married, reaching goals, vacations or anything like that. i'm talking stuff that's helping. what have i done that's helped make a difference? so take a look at the big picture with me. from far away it looks great and has amazing detail with colors you've never seen. as we bring it closer we start seeing the poverty, crime, murder, homelessness, pollution, war, racism, sexism and all other hatred/bad things you can think of. the good: tons of ordinary people are making moves to get rid of things like those listed above. the bad: not enough people are stepping up willing to make those moves. some of us are being lazy and not pulling our weight. so now that i'm a wise twenty-six year old i'm stepping up my game. i'm gonna make freakin' moves like a u-haul (pretty sure i'm making that into a t-shirt). we need to take our blinders off and look more closely at the big picture and pick a spot that needs help (everywhere) and focus on it. we're all artists and we can touch up any part of the big picture as long as we try (wow...i knew that was bad while even writing it). if we don't do anything then guess what guessed it!

I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love. 
-Mother Teresa

How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world. 

-Anne Frank

Act as if what you do makes a difference.  It does. 

-William James

Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself. 

-Leo Nikolaevich Tolstoy

The purpose of life is not to be happy - but to matter, to be productive, to be useful, to have it make some difference that you have lived at all. 
-Leo Rosten

Live simply that others might simply live. 

-Elizabeth Ann Seton

We can do no great things, only small things with great love. 
-Mother Teresa

Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better.  It's not. 

-Dr. Seuss

It seems to me that any full grown, mature adult would have a desire to be responsible, to help where he can in a world that needs so very much, that threatens us so very much. 
-Norman Lear

Being good is commendable, but only when it is combined with doing good is it useful. 

-Author Unknown

I am a little pencil in the hand of a writing God who is sending a love letter to the world. 

-Mother Teresa (Agnes Gonxha Bojarhiu)

I am only one, but I am one.  I cannot do everything, but I can do something.  And I will not let what I cannot do interfere with what I can do. 

-Edward Everett Hale

The willingness to share does not make one charitable; it makes one free. 

-Robert Brault

It is the greatest of all mistakes to do nothing because you can only do little - do what you can. 
-Sydney Smith

Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could only do a little. 

-Edmund Burke

If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one. 

-Mother Teresa

Never worry about numbers.  Help one person at a time, and always start with the person nearest you. 

-Mother Teresa

Wherever a man turns he can find someone who needs him. 

-Albert Schweitzer

He who gives when he is asked has waited too long. 

-Sunshine Magazine

This is the true joy in life - being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap; being a force of nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy. 

-George Bernard Shaw

Nobody can do everything, but everyone can do something. 

-Author Unknown

The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade you do not expect to sit. 

-Nelson Henderson

While earning your daily bread, be sure you share a slice with those less fortunate. 

-H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

The difference between a helping hand and an outstretched palm is a twist of the wrist. 

-Laurence Leamer, King of the Night

No man stands so straight as when he stoops to help a boy. 

-Knights of Pythagoras 

Charity sees the need, not the cause. 
-German Proverb

In about the same degree as you are helpful, you will be happy. 
-Karl Reiland

How far that little candle throws his beams!
So shines a good deed in a naughty world.
-William Shakespeare

If we could all hear one another's prayers, God might be relieved of some of his burdens. 
-Ashleigh Brilliant

Dare to reach out your hand into the darkness, to pull another hand into the light. 
-Norman B. Rice

I expect to pass through life but once.  If therefore, there be any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to any fellow being, let me do it now, and not defer or neglect it, as I shall not pass this way again. 
-William Penn

Be an opener of doors for such as come after thee, and do not try to make the universe a blind alley. 
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own. 
-Benjamin Disraeli


here's some news for ya's

a lot of what i blog about (100% so far) is from my perspective. it's from the life of tony gould. well, a major part of tony gould is emily gould (she literally is the better half). ok, now that i'm done speaking in the third person we'll move on. i've tried to get emily to blog on here about cool things we've done together but she's too chicken. ok, that's not entirely true. so here's what we're gonna do (said like a high school coach with a new trick play) we're going to create a new blog that we can both blog on. now, i know what you're thinking. "another blog? really?" the answer is yes and if you don't like it then don't read it (smiley winky face). oh, and don't case you like me more than emily you'll still have this blog to read. the 'emily and tony' blog will be up shortly and i'll let all you anxious readers know when it's live.

1. good idea?____
2. bad idea?_____
3. does anyone care?_____

answer sheet:
yes = 1
no = 0
must get 2/3 to be considered awesome
question 2 does not count.


i'm reading a new book and this was in it...

"Two guys are talking to each other, and one of them says he has a question for God. He wants to ask why God allows all of this poverty and war and suffering to exist in the world. And his friend says, "Well, why don't you ask?" The fellow shakes his head and says he is scared. When his friend asks why, he mutters, "I'm scared God will ask me the same question."
-The Irresistible Revolution by Shane Claiborne

most of you have heard that today is the rapture. well friends...sorry to say it isn't. i just want to point out Matthew 24 to some folks. in verse 36 it says, "No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father." of all the "debatable" topics in the Bible...i am pretty sure this isn't one. of course, that's just my opinion.

what has all of the hype done for me? it's reiterated the urgency we (Christ followers) have to show God's love to this world. everyone. the entire world. every human in it. 100% of all mankind. no one left out. no one not good enough.

we are the body.
we are the hands.
we are the feet.
we are the church.

The Great Commission

16 Then the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go. 17 When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted. 18 Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”
-Matthew 28:16-20


first marathon week is almost what?

i'm sure you're all wondering how the week after (zero week) the marathon has been for me. to be honest with wasn't as bad as i heard it could be. i did notice the slight disappointment of being done with training and working towards the goal of completing a marathon. also my immune system crashed and i got a nice two day cold, but other than that...i think i'm okay. as far as physical pain goes...sunday through tuesday was pretty rough, but by wednesday i was finally walking normal (and not freaking emily out by walking downstairs backward).

i didn't run until yesterday when i went out for an easy three. of course that easy three turned in to trying to run it faster than i ever have. funny how that worked. it was nice though to go out just to get back into the swing of things. i realized today that i really need to figure out how to get back into the gym (meaning: find the time). i got out of the habit half-way through my training and i think it really had an affect on my marathon results.

...but who cares about all that crap, right? so, i ask myself, "well...what's next, man?!" i answer, "anything i freakin' want!" i'm not gonna lie...originally i wanted to set out for a triathlon, but my fear of water might delay that a bit. i also don't have a bike, so for now i'll use that as my excuse. i do also see a fifty-miler in my future...somewhere down the road. for now though, i'm thinking i'm going to get into trail running and maybe going to work toward another full-marathon. maybe fall of this year? maybe chicago? maybe indy? maybe stl? maybe a different country? what?

i thought it'd be fun to do just a little recap of some memorable quotes from race weekend with emily...

emily (sarcastically): "i think that race could've used more cowbell."

emily: "you're walking funny."
tony: "'s my swagger."

tony (from the top of the stairs): "hey, walk downstairs doesn't hurt at all!"
emily: "no way, you look like a zombie or something."

emily: "hey, let's go on a walk this week, just because we can!"

sign at race: "gas is $4.13/gallon...keep's cheaper!"

sign at race: "if it was easy i'd be doing it"

drunk frat boy at mile one: "KEEP GOING...YOU'RE ALMOST THERE!!"

tony: "i literally ran the distance between the college hills starbucks in bloomington to my parents in gridley!"
         "emily, you ran from lake bloomington to gridley!"
         "there's something wrong with both of those statements."

there are many more i could share...but i think you get the general theme here! it was a long, tiring weekend...but we did it and it was awesome!


marathon training (week eighteen) race week!


...and i made it. after eighteen weeks of successful training with just very minor injuries and aches and pains and what was the result? i went and ran 26.2 miles yesterday and now i can't walk normal. i have to walk downstairs backward. if i squat there's a high likelihood that i will not be getting back up. last night my muscles were spasming, so that was freaky to watch. oh, and sometimes when i'm randomly sitting trying to enjoy dinner...i'll get a leg cramp that stands me straight up in .2 seconds. other than that though...i'm doing AWESOME!

the race started great. it was 51, overcast, and the wind was a little gusty. by mile 5 i realized i was doing what i had just done times 5, so i started to think things over. once i came up on miles 8-9 is when the first place half-marathoner passed us (not defeating at all!) btw...awesome job goes out to Emily for crushing her first half-marathon time by almost ten minutes!! she ran the half in 02:19:45! (and no one knows this...but she was struggling with some knee pain for the past couple weeks in her training...she's a machine!)

onto the half-way point...sucked. the realization that i had to do everything i had just done started to sink in. at mile 14 or 15 (memory is a little fuzzy at this point) i had to take a pee break. i'll admit it was a bit awkward hopping into a portapotty and swaying all around trying to go to the bathroom. at mile 16 or 17 i had officially hit the wall. most of you probably know what this is. it's when you say to yourself, "you. are. insane. why are you doing this to yourself? you'll never ever finish and your body is not going to work right ever again! stop running!!"

i was using GU (gel packs) to refuel throughout the race since i trained with them, but i had never had the chocolate flavor. right around mile 18 (i think) i grabbed a chocolate flavor GU from a volunteer by mistake but really needed it so i took it anyway. a half mile later at the next water stop i took water and a little didn't mix well in my stomach. i got a little nauseous and didn't take on any calories the rest of the race. so, the combination of hitting the wall and no fuel for the last 6.2 miles made it a little difficult. i ended up walking through water stops to finish out the race with a finish time of 04:46:52. a little longer than what i had hoped for...but honestly, i ran 26.2 miles so i'm not being too hard on myself. oh, and it was pretty awesome to be negative calories until 7:00 yesterday, too.

thanks to everyone who's been following my training, leaving me comments of encouragement, and letting me know that i can do anything i put my mind to. trust me...those were some of the things that helped me cross the finish line.

one thing i learned/re-learned this week in regards to running: running a full marathon is freakin' hard...but possible. now go try it for yourself!

week eighteen numbers:

starting weight: 184

monday - rest
tuesday - 4 miles / 34:13 (8:34)
wednesday - rest
thursday - 3 miles / 27:30 (9:10)
friday - rest
saturday - 26.2 / 04:46:52 (10:57)
sunday - just a little rest

total mileage for the week: 33.2 miles

ending weight: 182

total weight loss/gain: -2